top of page
Jen Labesky

Self Doubt


In my last blog post, I mentioned that one of the most powerful “secrets” to success lies in understanding that WE are the only ones who control our thoughts. That WE are the only ones who have the power to decide which thoughts we honor, and which we release (beginning with self-doubt).


Yes, I know it's is easier said than done sometimes, but simply understanding this concept goes a long way toward opening our eyes to our true power.


I know it’s easy to get behind this idea when things are going great in our lives. Who doesn’t agree that we have the power when our thoughts are happy and positive and empowered.


But what about when they’re not?

What about when thoughts of self-criticism or self-doubt begin to swirl in our heads?

Those nagging negative thoughts can take on a life of their own, and suddenly feel very REAL.


But remember this: They’re not real.

They’re just THOUGHTS.


At first glance it might sound overly simplistic, but consider this: Those voices, those doubts that creep in? When we really take a look at them and break them all the way down to their fundamental existence, they are JUST thoughts.


Yes, they are thoughts based on years of misinformation, criticism or judgement from other people, but they are still just thoughts.


OUR thoughts.

Thoughts WE control.

And as such, WE get to choose which ones we focus on.


Once we TRULY understand this, we are finally able to take back our power from all the voices that have taken up residency in our minds over the years.

WE get to choose whether to grant them space in our minds, continuing to re-play the cycle of self-doubt in our head…

or we can STOP. Just for a second. Recognize them and call them out for what they are… just THOUGHTS… and choose a different thought.


This is such a simple, yet infinitely powerful tool.


Because here’s the deal, we can only think about one thing at a time. Just one.


So when we find ourselves stuck in a cycle of negative thoughts, we can CHOOSE to think about something else.

Does this mean we bury negative thoughts or self-doubt?

Absolutely not.


But we CAN choose to dive in and deal with those thoughts intentionally, in a time and place when we are feeling up to that work. Instead of letting them become a low hum casting a dark shadow on the glorious moments of our lives.

What works for me when negative thoughts or self-doubt creep in?

I like to keep a default thought handy for times when I want to replace a destructive thought.


A default thought is one we can shift our focus to the moment we recognize a thought creeping in that isn’t in our best interest.


One of my default thoughts is of sneaking up on my teenagers for a hug when they aren’t expecting it. Of course they think "mom hugs" are uncool, but deep down, beneath the eye rolls, I know they feel loved. The positive feelings I associate with this thought are so much stronger than any negative thoughts that creeps into my head, so shifting to this thought stops the self-doubt in its tracks.

Remember, we can only truly think one thought at a time, so replacing a thought of self-doubt by intentionally choosing one that lifts us up is crazy powerful!

Other thoughts that work well are memories of successes or victories that we associate with strong feelings of joy or pride. It doesn’t matter what the thought is; what matters are the feelings associated with the thought. So when the negative thoughts creep in, we're armed and ready to replace them with a thought that brings us back to a strong place.


Remember, at the end of the day, WE are the only ones who have access to our thoughts.


No one can force you to believe something that doesn’t resonate with your truth.


Feel the beautiful power in that.


Feel the power in knowing that YOU get to choose thoughts that lift you up, thoughts that remind you that you are absolutely limitless.

And you get to replace the ones that don’t.

Because as Henry Ford so famously said -

“Whether you think you can or you think you can’t - you’re right.”


THAT is the power of our thoughts.

THAT is YOUR power.


Xx Jen

As always, if you know of someone who needs this message today, please share this with her. Thank you xx

4 views0 comments

Comments


bottom of page